Contemplating Boundaries

For a long time the idea of having boundaries was taboo. If you were a good, helpful human, it meant you were available and flexible in a manner defined by those around you. But we have learned. We have learned that this style of being, it may serve those around us, but it does not serve us.

A common metaphor is that of putting our own oxygen masks on before then assisting those around us. Another is that we cannot pour from an empty cup. This flips the notion on it’s head that tending to ourselves first is selfish, it is in fact a strategy that sustains. It sustains us and our loved ones. It sustains our professional selves and our workplaces.

It is in fact, grand act of love both to ourselves and others that we first take the time to care and develop ourselves, so that we can then offer back a version of ourselves that is true and authentic rather than a depleted shell. It does not mean that in looking after ourselves first that we will never be messy, tired, emotional or forgetful. The goal is not perfection. It does however mean that we know what we need when we are feeling messy, tired, emotional or forgetful. It means we can say no to attending an event or being asked a favour because one no may nourish us for the next two yeses.

If you feel like you would like support in diving into your boundaries and self care, this is a great goal for coaching. Or if you feel you have old patterns and blocks that are preventing you from moving forward into curating a life that honours you and your values, perhaps explore a CTC Therapy Session, two hours can be transformational.